Owner's Manuals for Various Garth Nix Characters
by Peachy Garlic
Summary: Based on Theresa Green's owner's manuals for various LOTR characters. Dedicated to treanz-alyce.
1. Introduction to the Owner's Manual

A/N: OK, this ENTIRE fic is dedicated to treanz-alyce, and the actual thing is coming tomorrow, OK? Disclaimer: I don't own Garth Nix, TUF paper towels, or OAKLEY. I don't own the original idea of an owner's manual, Theresa Green does. There are also other really cool owners manuals for TP (ziasfiremage) and HP (treanz-alyce) and POTC (various people), you can check out Theresa Green's bio for those and more. Please R&R when I post the rest!  
  
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~*~*~*~*~*~*~CONGRATULATIONS!~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
You may now consider yourself a proud owner of a unique model created just for you by Garth Nix Inc.!  
  
To keep your model in fine, working condition, follow the instructions and guidelines in this manual. Your model will arrive in a packed crate or carton. Before opening it, read the entire manual. We thank you for your co- operation.  
  
If you have any questions or comments about your new Garth Nix Inc. model, do not hesitate to contact our management.  
  
Garth Nix Inc.  
  
1946 Belisaere Avenue, Old Kingdom Postal Code: 259F36A7  
  
Phone: (285) 478-4649  
  
Fax: (848) 274-1947  
  
Manager: Peachy Garlic  
  
We hope you are pleased with your purchase, and hope you buy from Garth Nix Inc. again sometime soon.  
  
OFFERS: Set the GN Inc. site to your homepage! Buy TUF paper towels, the best money can buy! GN Inc. is a proud sponsor of TUF paper towels. OAKLEY is proud to present: Super Shading Transparent Sunglasses! Call OAKLEY for further details. 


	2. Section 22 35 Subheading R

A/N: I hope no one else has done this. I searched long and hard and I didn't find one. If someone else has already written this, PLEASE tell me and I will remove mine immediately. Disclaimer: I don't own any of these people, like Sabriel or Touchstone or Mogget, and I don't even own the idea of an Owner's manual...Theresa Green does! I don't own THE HULK© either. Imagine that! But I own the Garth Nix one, as no one has told me that they posted theirs first...so. This fic is based on Theresa Green's Owner's manuals for various LOTR characters, ziasfiremage's "Owners Manuals for Various Tortallans" and treanz-alyce's "Owners Manuals for Various HP Characters". Have fun reading! Ok, by the way, tell m about typos and facts I mistook/misread so that I can fix them up!  
  
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SECTION 22 3.5, Subheading R  
  
~**~***~**~CONGRATULATIONS~**~***~**~  
  
You are the owner of a brand new SABRIEL model! Please carefully review the instructions in this manual to keep your SABRIEL functioning properly!  
  
~*~  
  
TECHNICAL DETAILS:  
  
Name: SABRIEL  
  
Type: Human (female, Old Kingdom)  
  
Manufacturing Companies: Abhorsen Co. Ltd., Unspecified Division  
  
Height: Around 5", depending on the age of your SABRIEL  
  
Date of Production: unknown  
  
Length: N/A  
  
~*~  
  
INSTALLATION PROCEDURES:  
  
Your SABRIEL will arrive in a Wyverly College uniform, fully equipped with luggage. She will also have several items such as skis, BANDOLIER, SWORD, and provisions. Another uniform will also be provided along with your SABRIEL. This includes, but is not limited to, armor, SURCOAT, a belt, and BOOK OF THE DEAD.  
  
Take care of the carton in which your SABRIEL will arrive. You do not want to damage your SABRIEL. Carefully undo the wooden clasps and release your model into either a school environment or a misty river-it is preferable to have both in a similar area. Be sure that, if you choose the river setting, there is no noise to be heard apart from natural sounds. You also should make the river tug at the heels, and create the sound of a waterfall in the distance. You may wish to give your SABRIEL her own room if you choose a school environment. Make sure that this room is personalized. Provide a chair and a window facing the moon, a smashed teacup on the ground, as well as a single bed. Your SABRIEL will feel at home. Always keep the river setting nearby your SABRIEL until she adjusts.  
  
CAUTION: Do not allow your SABRIEL to come into contact with any shadows. She will attempt to destroy them. It is advisable to keep your SABRIEL relaxed until she is adjusted to her new home.  
  
~*~  
  
ACCESSORIES AND EXPANSION:  
  
Clothing: Uniforms from Wyverly College will have the Wyverly blazon. If you wish to remove this logo, call the department office. Your SABRIEL will also come with the SURCOAT. This is a garment that your SABRIEL should be permitted to wear at all times, if she wishes. The SABRIEL also comes with a cloth wrapped helmet, plated armor, and several other garments. Keep these stored at room temperature, as you will not want them spoiled. Clean these often to prevent rust or mold.  
  
*~~*If you pre-ordered the ABHORSEN'S HOUSE expansion pack, your SABRIEL will include:*~~*  
  
SWORD: Pewter sword with bronze sheath. Inner core contains remote controlled lava lamp. If there are any problems with the SWORD unit, please contact Garth Nix Inc. immediately. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO REPAIR SWORD YOURSELF! Do NOT separate your SABRIEL from her sword.  
  
BANDOLIER: Several small silver bells, ranging in size. Come with leather bandolier and straps. Also contains small leashes for any shadows or DEAD CREATURES that your SABRIEL unit might wish to banish. Do NOT separate SABRIEL from BANDOLIER. See Section 8295.28f-a-c Subsection 1.E for more details.  
  
MOGGET: A small, white cat. Has small tape player inside, with five special edition CYNIC tapes. Also comes with releasable collar. NOTE: If collar is removed, the MOGGET unit will activate FREE MAGIC mode, using the incorporated laser beam to injure any SABRIEL units nearby. Be SURE to provide your SABRIEL with RUBY RING and warn her of this potential danger. Other modes are CAT mode and DWARF mode, which are self-explanatory. Use with caution. Our company does not refund damage to the Mogget unit inflicted by the SABRIEL unit, or vice versa. See Section 4.3 for more details.  
  
PAPERWING: A paper airplane with a plastic hammock seat. Equipped with small mirror with embedded television screen depicting various CHARTER marks upon activation. Your SABRIEL already comes equipped with extensive knowledge of the CHARTER (See Section 9026 for more details), so these markings will be familiar to her. DO NOT ALLOW YOUR SABRIEL TO ATTEMPT TO PILOT THE PAPERWING INDOORS OR OUTDOORS WITHOUT SUPERVISION. Garth Nix Inc. does NOT refund Paperwings. These devices are flammable and may be destructive in the hands of your SABRIEL, so use with extreme caution.  
  
BOOK OF THE DEAD: This book does not contain CHARTER marks, as do the other books in the extensive HOUSE LIBRARY, available by mail order. It contains vital information that your SABRIEL will need to know for her future. KEEP THE BOOK WITH YOUR SABRIEL AT ALL TIMES, as she may need to look something up in times of need.  
  
RUBY RING: This is another item that is useful, both for decoration and for serious purposes. The RUBY RING unit will only be needed if you own a MOGGET model. If MOGGET's collar is removed and MOGGET shifts to FREE MAGIC mode, your SABRIEL will be at high risk for destruction. Instead of tracking her, equip her with a RUBY RING. She will be able to take care of herself.  
  
*~~*If you pre-ordered the BELISAERE expansion pack, your SABRIEL will include:*~~*  
  
SANAR/RYELLE: Two twin CLAYR models with blond hair. Warning: These units are capable of creating a pane of ice with embedded television screen from their ICE WANDS. When ICE WAND units malfunction, refill them with frozen water. If they continue to malfunction, call Garth Nix Inc. at the number below. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO REPAIR ICE WAND UNITS YOURSELF!  
  
TOUCHSTONE: See Section 56 A.12 for further details.  
  
(SHADOW) HANDS: Deformed corpses. DO NOT allow HANDS or SHADOW HANDS to come anywhere near your SABRIEL model if you wish to keep them and your SABRIEL safe. Fake blood available at no extra charge. Replacement parts available at your local Garth Nix Inc. dealer. Replacement parts include jaws, arm bones, and other body parts. Also available with GRAVE DIRT at no extra fees except a shipping and handling toll. See Subsection 2749.2 H for more details. Classified as DEAD CREATURE.  
  
ABHORSEN/NECROMANCER: See Section 205,100F Page 5 for more details.  
  
MORDICANT: A large remote-controlled HULK© action figure, equipped with black flame overcoat and LOLLING FLAME TONGUE. Warning: Keep all MORDICANT units FAR away from SABRIEL unit. It will cause your SABRIEL serious damage and your MORDICANT may be injured by contact with SABRIEL. Includes GRAVE DIRT and SERVANT MAKING POWER, as well as light-speed expansion pack. Use with caution. See Subsection 2749.2 H and Section 94.2B½ for more details. Classified as DEAD CREATURE.  
  
KERRIGOR: See Section 94.2B½ for more details. Classified as DEAD CREATURE.  
  
MAGISTRIX: A large, portly woman. Includes magical powers and faint knowledge of the CHARTER and FREE MAGIC. Will help SABRIEL in times of need. Comes equipped with emerald green dress.  
  
~*~  
  
OPERATION PROCEDURES:  
  
ABHORSEN MODE: This mode is used most often. SABRIEL will always be busy fighting off shadows or DEAD CREATURES. For SABRIEL to function in this mode she must have with her her BANDOLIER (with enclosed leashes for banishment) and SWORD. Your room will be sunny forever when your SABRIEL unit is with you.  
  
QUEEN MODE: This mode is used when your SABRIEL is not in ABHORSEN mode. It allows her to think politically and make proper decisions good for her country as a whole. This mode is also known as the DIPLOMAT MODE.  
  
ADVENTURER MODE: Your SABRIEL model will often get bored and randomly wish to go out and explore the world. Let her do so, as she will always return fresh and happy from such a journey. She may wish to take MOGGET with her. MAKE SURE SHE TAKES RUBY RING UNIT!  
  
RESCUER MODE: SABRIEL will often feel it is her duty as ABHORSEN to rescue people subdued by necromancy. She will especially wish to rescue naked young men. Do not prevent her from doing so, but make sure this is done under supervision. . .  
  
MOTHER MODE: SABRIEL is an excellent mother. She will care for her children, even in her hectic schedule. She loves kids and is a great party planner. She will tell the kids about her fantastic adventures and give them tips on how to avoid DEAD CREATURE units.  
  
~*~  
  
FRIENDLINESS AND COMPANIONSHIP:  
  
It is possible to reproduce using your SABRIEL and TOUCHSTONE units. The results may include but are not limited to ELLIMERE and SAMETH units. See Sections 3.4 and 966 ¾ Subheading T for more details.  
  
SABRIEL will NOT get along with any DEAD CREATURES or NECROMANCERS. These include KERRIGOR, HANDS, GORE CROWS, SHADOW HANDS, CHLORR, etc. Please refer to Section 94.2B½ for more details.  
  
SABRIEL may also occasionally get along with any MOGGET, LIRAEL, MAGISTRIX, CLAYR or ABHORSEN models your friends and family may own. It is safe to let them interact, as long as SABRIEL has everything she may need (RUBY RING, BANDOLIER, SWORD, BOOK OF THE DEAD) to protect herself.  
  
~*~  
  
FAQ:  
  
Q: May I allow my SABRIEL to live outdoors?  
  
A: Of course! SABRIEL is a natural outdoorswoman. She may ask for provisions and the like, however, and these may include several things needed from your nearest Garth Nix Inc. dealer such as banishing leashes and replacement bells.  
  
Q: My SABRIEL always tries to rip off the figureheads of my expensive yacht and model ships. How can I fix this?  
  
A: There is no way to fix this problem. It is a bug in the SABRIEL unit's system. Buy a TOUCHSTONE model and everything should turn back to normal.  
  
Q: My SABRIEL sits by my NINE GATES EXPANSION PACK and broods. Is there no way to fix this?  
  
A: No, unfortunately, unless you buy her a temporary ABHORSEN unit. This will only cheer her up momentarily, however, and it may make things worse Only resort to this in a desperate situation. Your SABRIEL may also wish to enter the NINE GATES, a.k.a. the Realm of the Dead. Your SABRIEL comes with a lifetime warranty, so you may allow her to enter. Just make sure she doesn't go for more than an hour at a time.  
  
Q: My SABRIEL refuses to take a bath, even when she gets a bloody nose. How can I do this?  
  
A: This may often occur while your SABRIEL is in ADVENTURER mode. Be patient, and if it still doesn't work, hang the BOOK OF THE DEAD over the water. She knows just how valuable it really is.  
  
Q: May I engage in bedroom activities with my SABRIEL?  
  
A: If you do not wish to reproduce and create ELLIMERE and SAMETH units, you may. Just . . . be careful. You can never tell when SABRIEL will pull out her sword. It will also be plenty of work and pay for the divorce lawyers. If you want a stay at home wife, don't try it.  
  
~*~  
  
TROUBLESHOOTING:  
  
My SABRIEL unit plays panpipes whenever she sees my shadow.  
  
You have been issued a LIRAEL unit. See Section 93.4 AD for further information on how to maintain your LIRAEL until you wish or can make an exchange for another model. Besides, you may want to keep LIRAEL. You have to admit, it is entertaining.  
  
My SABRIEL constantly bosses me around, is always in DIPLOMAT mode, and refuses to become adventurous!  
  
You have been issued an ELLIMERE unit. See Sections 3.4 for further information on your ELLIMERE. Flip to the back of this manual for returning instructions. If you wish to keep your ELLIMERE, make sure she is comfortable in her setting. Otherwise...  
  
My PAPERWING that came with my SABRIEL refuses to fly with her!  
  
This is a bug in the PAPERWING unit's system. Please follow returning instructions at the back of this manual. It may have also been night. PAPERWING models do not enjoy flying by night. By the way, you can't really blame it, either.  
  
~*~  
  
FINAL NOTE:  
  
See Subsection A.D Page 28 to learn more about the NINE GATES EXPANSION PACK. Your SABRIEL will give you hours of fun and happiness. ENJOY!~ 


End file.
